The Wisdom in the Dark

Artwork: Katie Holten

There is a belief  – especially in the spiritual world – that darkness is negative, undesirable, bad, evil, wicked, gloomy, and full of nothing but despair, destruction, death.

Conversely, positivity pumping love and light blah blah is the norm, status quo.

It’s all about different, now, pushing, better, fixing.

Or what can also be recognized as: distraction, bypassing, forging ahead prematurely, resistance to feeling difficult emotions for an elongated period, running from ourselves constantly, chasing only bliss to numb out –  not respecting the journey Source is guiding us to, in order to go deeper, shed, heal, grow, rise, evolve.

(Aka: “scurrying to the glare of artificial lights.”)

As children, we were taught to be afraid of the dark, whether it was the direction of grown ups around us, our peers, or pop culture, etc. – it was deemed scary, unknown, we were taught to fear it.

However –

There is much depth and richness seeded in the dark,

That is required to nourish and cultivate the breathing ground of your next becoming.

The lotus must cross the dark mud to reach the light in the form of a radiant flower,

Beautiful light beings grow in the dark of the womb.

Our dream world appears when we close our eyes, Her messages from the subtle and subsconscious realms often delivering gems, pointers, considerations, deepenings – some kind of telegram.

We close our eyes before steeping into an elongated meditation – and a vast, spacious, expansive Being’ness may be revealed to us.

The shining diamond is uncovered from the dark, dense coal.

The tall standing forest elder roots up from the dark, expansive ecosystem in the deep, dank ever communing soils beneath.

Our heart is breathing life into us from our very insides.

The night sky is illuminated by an infinity of stars,

The Great Moon Mother guides us through the mysteries of the dark.

What are we afraid of?

Perhaps because it represents an unknowing amid a culture that is configured to want to know, control, steer.

(We are taught from day one: this is right, that is wrong, no, yes, your name is…you are this, you are not that…)

Perhaps we feel we will get stuck in the dark, no way out, a black hole.

So we scrape at the outside edges, the walls, anything, something – to prevent ourselves from going down further, more inward, deeper, to the most inner depths of the soul’s ground that is awaiting your complete surrender, your full, undivided attention – for a prolonged period, so that the real work – may begin, so that your deepest healing – can unfold, so that your deepest calling – may be revealed, so that you have – what you undoubtedly require to truly step into what your soul has been whispering to you ever so steadily, for some time.

We compare ourselves to everyone around us,

What we haven’t done, haven’t become, aren’t doing, are not,

For a time, we may feel deep despair

(In a media-induced culture that constantly tells us we are not ok, and blasts us with how we can be good enough, worthy enough.)

Despair is not “beautiful”, no one wants to feel that, nor go there, nor be around that, 

So they stay away, in fear of their own masked sorrow being mirrored back to them.

Hide (and go seek – outside) has been drilled into us since day one.

How do we find the balance amid the light and the dark?

Truly stay with and commit to what is showing itself –

While taking refuge in the deep knowing that everything is shifting and moving in this realm, nothing is static.

With the exception of the Ground of Being that this very movement and shift is playing out on – One’s True Essence.

It’s ok to feel vulnerable – can we soften into it? 

Relax into it

This feeling into vulnerability is an act of courage, of great strength – our heart soft, open,

This vulnerability is compassion for oneself (and others), 

And compassion – is a vulnerable act.

Together they harmonize to deepen into the intimacy of Presence.

For Presence contains feeling, Presence is not about bypassing feeling. This is embodiment, this is integration of our full aliveness.

What are our anchors? How do we root?

We can remain soft rather than have life harden us, deeply commit to nurturing and nourishing ourselves as best we can, while caring for each other as best we can,

Immersing into the holy and stillness of nature, being incredibly patient, expressing gratitude – there’s always something to be grateful for (even in the long, dark – for gratitude is l i g h t).

We can keep breathing into the tightness, elongating the out breath, knowing that this too will fall away – the underlying essence of this earthly existence.

Indeed, we can engage what grounds us – 

Like really commit to it for the long haul, as a foundation for what we will stand on in order to move through the times of thick, dense, muck – in order to move through the natural flow of life.

This is presence, not getting lost in the contents and functioning from survival mode – the entrenched shadow of our global culture – 

But rather, making choices that support bringing our whole life into a l i g n m e n t with the anchor We Are.

Can we choose something different, something more soulful? 

Something closer to the ground, 

Laying a foundation to hold the pillars of this unfolding journey in us.

That will surely guide a steady Presence through the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful.

Can we grow enough spaciousness in us to hold both the unwanted alongside the wanted?

And essentially, this Is the necessary bridge to what awaits us,

Through whatever your daily practice forms as – only that it sincerely be something: sacred stillness, nature, simplicity, ease.

It requires presence with the natural, Divine unfolding, and an unending trust that is its own quiet resilience.

That old adage: we must feel to heal – it’s the only way we will not suppress, repress; the only way that the contents will not lodge inside our organs and/or subtle spaces, stuck, festering, growing mold, sickness, pain.

It requires a reliable patience, and a relaxing into a more natural, elemental movement; a resting into the trust of what Is.

And an infinite conversation with Source,

The Source that streams You

This sublime natural rhythm moving through you: it Is

For You

and it Is

You.

Unify with it, not fight and struggle against it. 

This is what will hold us in the long dark, even when it is extremely challenging – it is to feel into the emotions for however long it takes to feel into them; not become them – an alchemical process of transmutation that breeds the fertile ground you will eventually and ultimately step out onto.

This stream is not popular, and it goes against everything our society and culture tells us – a solution to every problem market, that creates problems, then sells us healing, tells us we need to be fixed, we need to get better, we need to feel better, do better –

After first sealing our original feeling of not being ok.

Well. This is a different kind of healing. It cannot be rushed, packaged, labelled, branded. 

Otherwise the revelation is partial, half done – and it will no doubt keep looping until we give it the space it is wailing for, be still – Can You Hear Her?

This path is of the ancient ways that have been lost (colonized). 

Deep, rootsy, of the earth, aligned with the elements.

For me, it is truest way of healing, with the deepest dive into oneself, myself.

It reveals secrets, medicines, openings – that cannot be accessed with any other key. It is not for sale. It is the deepest listening, the most nourished expansiveness held together by stillness, devotion, service – to a quiet, mysterious knowing. 

It has its own rhythm,

It’s own wisdom, 

It Is (its own medicine).


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